Ever have a relationship with someone who you just don't get? Even worse is when you can't get rid of the relationship that you don't get either. I find myself spending useless hours on the telephone with my mother who only cares about herself and who wants to solve my problems with a simple wag of her tongue of wisdom. Mind you this wisdom has rarely done me any good in my life and has caused many a heartache and fight in years past. I am not saying I have been an innocent victim. No, I have opened up myself to the brutal attacks of her useless wisdom and hurtful advice. I have confided in her things that have come back to haunt me numerous times. No, I cannot claim to be an innocent victim when I actively came to her seeking solace and comfort knowing full well she is incapable of such things. Yet, I still keep a relationship with her because she is, after all, my mother. I do thank God he only gave me one mother, I doubt I could handle another one like her.
Being a good daughter, I devote an average of thirty to sixty minutes a day of my cell phone time to listen to her rant on and on about others short comings, her supposed poverty (total BS), and my loser of a life. I am reminded that my husband is inadequate as a provider, I have no children and that I am poor. As if I need to be reminded of this on a daily basis, and as if I'm not actually living it in my life. Thank you, mother divine, for the constant reminder that I am a loser in your eyes.
This year has been my designated year to end this madness in my life. I am no longer allowing her to belittle my life and affect my sanity. I no longer place value on the things she says, nor do I value her judgements of my life.
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